I’m about to admit something that may stop you from reading this post and from ever coming back to my page. Please, hear me out. Ready? I’m not a huge Beyonce fan. 

Are you still there?

Before you come for me, let me say that I am an admirer of hers as a businesswoman and empire-builder. And she is an exceptional entertainer without question. Here’s the thing, I’m not necessarily her target audience when it comes to the music. She has a beautiful voice, and I would like to hear more of it in her songs. But one song that I play on repeat is Pretty Hurts because it reminds me that to strive for perfection is self-abuse and cruelty, and yet we pursue it as if it means something.

Perfection Has A Definition, But No Meaning

What is perfection? The Oxford Language dictionary defines perfect as: 

• (adjective) having all the required or desirable elements, qualities, or characteristics; as good as it is possible to be;
• (adjective) absolute; complete (used for emphasis)
• (verb) make (something) completely free from faults or defects, or as close to such a condition as possible.

Does this sound doable? Does it even sound fun? And, by the way, how could you ever attain or maintain this level of being? 

How can a human being, or any living creature, reach the status of being free from fault or defect? It’s not possible, yet many strive to be perfect at work, at home, and in our relationships. It isn’t only women, men too. The tricky thing about perfection is that we often aren’t aware it’s what we’re trying to achieve because it has been so ingrained in us that we must be A-students, even as adults. That only A-students attend the best schools and get the best jobs, and ultimately have the best lives. 

Even if you aren’t a self-proclaimed perfectionist, you may be guilty of perfectionism, and it may be holding you back from achieving greatness. 

Greatness Is Found In the Imperfect, Not The Perfect

When I coach people on uncovering their superpower, one of the first concepts we discuss is the fear factor of comparison. We sort through all of the ways the individual has been comparing themselves to others, creating self-doubt and wallowing in imposter syndrome. 

And once we identify the source, we start to shed those narratives and embrace being a unicorn. One of the ways to do this is to declare your superpower. Your superpower is that one thing that no one else can do quite like you. 

Here’s why this is important to success. Your greatness is a perfect match for someone else’s needs. You are here to serve a particular set of people. And while you’re wilting under the spotlight of comparison, those people aren’t being served by you. 

What has made you great at what you do is that you tried, failed, iterated, and succeeded. You put your hand on the hot iron of life and learned. If perfection were what we needed as humanity, then we would all have the same point of view and experiences. There would be no need to learn or evolve.

Wabi Sabi, The Art of Being Perfectly Imperfect

I came across this beautiful concept the other day, wabi sabi, not to be confused with wasabi. Wabi sabi is the Japanese philosophy of not just accepting your imperfections, but celebrating them. The beauty of life, according to the practice, is found in being incomplete. When you aren’t perfect, you still have room to grow and discover.

I challenge you to consider this. If we were truly satisfied with perfection, would we have evolved as a species? We learned how to walk, but then we wanted to go faster, so we rode horses. But later that evolved into wagons, then boats, then cars, then planes, and then the moon. We were perfect when we could walk, run, and hunt. We never needed more than that, but we wanted more than that. 

Give Up Perfection To Embrace Your Greatness

But for imperfection, there would be no champagne, penicillin, post-it notes, or insulin. All of these fantastic discoveries, and more, came about by accident. In some instances, these were experiments gone “wrong.” Where would we be if those experiments had gone perfectly?

Interestingly enough, I never considered myself a perfectionist until my manager told me to stop being a perfectionist. He was annoyed with me because I would draw out the most straightforward task or presentation because I needed everything to be precise. As a reflection of my skills and knowledge, I never wanted anyone to question my work or position. So, I would tirelessly craft great presentations when only a draft was required. And when my manager brought it to my attention, I tapped into the source driving me toward perfectionism.

As a black woman, I often felt everything I produced had to be impeccable. Not only did it wear me out emotionally, but it was also holding me back professionally. At the time, I would rather be late than imperfect. It telegraphed to my manager that I didn’t know how to prioritize, and it was frustrating for all involved when the perfect presentation was rejected because there was a reason it was supposed to be a draft in the first place. 

You Might Be a Perfectionist If

Here are some ways to tell if perfection keeps you from achieving your goals and sharing your gifts. 

• Is the phrase “done is better than perfect” equivalent to “the call came from inside the house”?
• Do people roll their eyes when you say, “I just need a little more time?”
• Is that business plan still taking up residence in your mind and not your computer?
• Have you been waiting to get started on that life goal until [fill in the blank] is [fill in the blank] so you can [fill in the blank]?

There is no such thing as being perfect as a human being or producing a perfect product or service. There is forever room for improvement. I share with my coaching clients that I don’t coach to wholeness as a synonym for perfect. You can still be whole and have gaps. The gaps are meant to be filled because nature abhors a vacuum. And by filling the gaps, you will create more. Swiss cheese is not whole without the holes. Embrace your imperfection, and pair yourself with a delicious red.

Swiss cheese is not whole without the holes. Embrace your imperfection, and pair yourself with a delicious red.

Embrace your unicorn, be a warrior, and allow your imperfections to lead you to greatness. Or in the words of that great poet, Beyonce, 

We shine the light on whatever’s worst

Perfection is a disease of a nation

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